Note: We took this personality test as a staff and about half of us have this certain characteristic that describes us as liking hip hop music. Oh yeah…that is definitely us.
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Raising a boy into a man
3 years ago several friends and I covenanted together to help each other raise our sons into men. Having seen a lot of boys in men’s bodies over the years, we realized that a boy becoming a man just doesn’t happen automatically. So we decided that a part of the process would be celebrating specific age milestones with our boys. The first age milestone is 13. This year 3 of our boys turned 13.
At 13 we give the boys a compass with a definition of manhood engraved on it. The idea is that just as a compass helps point you in the right direction, so the manhood definition helps point our boys in the right direction of what it means to be a man.
Robert Lewis in his book Raising a Modern Day Knight has been extremely influential and helpful.
Writing a Better Story
In Donald Miller’s latest book “A Million Miles in a Thousand Years,” Don (because we are on first name basis) learns what makes a great story and ironically ends up learning what makes an even greater life. So many of the ingredients for a great story help make a greater life. There are ingredients such as conflict, memories and resolution. The most powerful ingredient that the best stories have is what writers call the “inciting incident.” This is a doorway that a character walks through in which there is no turning back. It is the pivotal decision or incident that happens that changes everything for the character.
In reflecting on this story device, it is a powerful metaphor for our own life. We each have inciting incidences that we can point to.
A decision that changed your life forever.
An event that irrevocably changed you.
The change could be for better or for worse.
My question is, “Can you create an inciting incident for your own life?” The reason to do so being that it forces a change that is necessary in your life.
I think the answer is yes.
For example, you want to change your health. An inciting incident could be as simple as telling 3 friends you are going to start jogging. Additionally you give these 3 friends permission to ask you how you are doing. Now this may not change your life, but for sure there’s no going back. You can keep your commitment or you can look like a slacker to your friends. I’m sure they will still love you if you are a slacker but who wants to be thought of as that. A little intentional inciting incident can make all the difference.
Or let’s say you long for a career change. What about filling out that admission form and jumping into a class? I know people who are content with an F but I’m going to assume if you are reading this you are not one of them and being in a class will actually motivate you.
What about spiritual growth? Ask for some accountability from your community group. Ask a friend to meet you for coffee for 6 weeks in a row just to pray. The key is that it has to be something in which YOU will find it hard to go back out on. Making a promise to yourself really won’t cut it. Making a promise to someone else AND doing some kind of action in the right direction may just do it.
An inciting incident for me a couple years ago was filling out the application and paying the $90.00 to run the Chicago Marathon AND then recruiting a veteran marathon runner to be my partner. It wasn’t one thing. It was all those things that became the doorway through which I couldn’t go back. Of course, you can say that I could have dropped out and in theory I could have, but I didn’t. And that for me is why it is an inciting incident. It was the combination of those things that put me “all in.”
So do you want to write a better story? Introduce an inciting incident into your life and see what happens?
Let the SERVOLUTION begin
A very close up video note:
Make sure to check out the SERVOLUTION page for an updated list of opportunities.
Movie outreach: Cloudy with a chance of meatballs
This Sunday we are having a special Suncrest-East showing of Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs right after church. This is an opportunity for us to reach out to friends and family and invite them this Sunday to Suncrest AND a movie. Tickets are only $2 so you can’t beat that! Go ahead and get some for your family and then get a few extra for some friends or your kids’ friends or strangers on the street.
I’ve created a special Paypal button below so you can purchase your tickets now before we sell out and then pick up the tickets on Sunday. It all starts at 9:30 this Sunday!
And here’s a sneak peak at the movie!
